Tomo

Authority Exchange Relationships

Styles of Leadership - Exploring Power and Personality in Authority Exchange

Understanding your leadership style as a Master or Dominant can strengthen the foundation of your dynamic and help those in your care serve with greater clarity, ease, and joy. For those who serve, recognizing the leadership style of your Master or Dominant can deepen surrender, reduce confusion, and support stronger communication. This class explores a range of leadership styles and how they show up in real-world M/s or D/s relationships. We’ll look at the impact different styles have on authority, service, emotional safety, and structure. Masters will be invited to reflect on your own approach, where it came from, how it works, and how it can evolve.  Servants will be encouraged to consider the style of leadership that allows them to thrive and have a better understanding of their Master’s style. Whether you lead, serve, or switch, you’ll leave with practical insights to support stronger alignment, more honest conversations, and a deeper understanding of the power you're exchanging.

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Bushido and Leather: Way of the Warrior, Way of the slave

With over two-thirds of his life immersed in Japanese martial arts, Tomo has long walked a path shaped by Bushido—the “Way of the Warrior.” As a Leather person, Dominant, and slave, that influence runs deep, offering a framework of discipline, honor, and intentional service that reaches far beyond the martial arts and into the heart of Leather. In this class, we’ll explore the eight virtues of Bushido—Honor, Justice, Courage, Compassion, Respect, Integrity, Loyalty, and Self-Control—and consider how they can inform our Leather lives, our relationships, and our leadership. Whether you’re on a path of mastery, service, or something more fluid, these principles offer rich insight into how we show up for ourselves and for one another. This class is a conversation about values, alignment, and how ancient codes still speak to modern Leather. Come curious, come reflective, and leave with new language for what you likely already know to be true in your Leather heart.

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Welcoming Resistance In Authority Exchange
Resistance is a natural part of any relationship that involves authority—but how we respond to it can either create distance or deepen connection. In this class, we’ll explore resistance from both sides of the slash. From the Master’s perspective, we’ll look at how leaders can recognize and manage resistance without defensiveness, using presence and power rather than resentment or fear. From the slave’s perspective, we’ll examine why resistance arises, what it may be trying to communicate, and how honest dialogue can lead to deeper surrender rather than prolonged struggle. This isn’t about eliminating resistance, it’s about understanding it. Together, we’ll reframe resistance not as disobedience or failure, but as an opportunity for engagement, clarity, and growth. Join Tomo for a grounded, real discussion of this often misunderstood aspect of authority exchange and discover how welcoming resistance might actually deepen and enrich your relationship.

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Grounded In The Storm: Staying Present During Conflict in Authority Exchange
In moments of conflict, challenge, or emotional stress, most of us default to familiar survival strategies: fight, flight, or freeze. But what if we could respond differently—by staying fully present? In this class, Tomo brings a principle from martial arts into the world of authority exchange relationships: staying centered during conflict. This is not about suppressing emotion or avoiding struggle. It’s about remaining grounded in your body, your purpose, and your connection—even when things get tense. We’ll explore how to recognize reactive patterns, stay engaged without escalation or retreat, and work toward resolution from a place of presence. Using a simple but powerful hand technique, participants will physically experience what it means to “stay in it”—not just conceptually, but in the body, mind, and heart. Come ready to reflect, participate, and leave with a practice you can carry into even the most challenging moments of your dynamic.

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The Art of Apology - Repair, Responsibility and Growth in Authority Exchange

“I’m sorry.” Three small words that can be surprisingly hard to say, especially in relationships that exchange authority where expectations can complicate even the best intentions. In this class, we’ll explore what it means to offer a clean, meaningful apology. We’ll examine why apologizing can feel so vulnerable or threatening, and how entrenchment, triggers, and miscommunication can get in the way of resolution. We’ll also talk about the myth that apology is a sign of weakness, especially for those in leadership, and how real strength lies in owning our impact. This class isn’t just about saying the right words. It’s about listening, taking responsibility, and using apology as a tool for healing and growth, no matter which side of the slash you live on. Join Tomo for an honest, experience-based conversation about conflict, repair, and the courage it takes to say, “I’m sorry,” and mean it.

 

Navigating the Plateau in Authority Exchange - Finding Growth in Stillness

Every path has its peaks and valleys and eventually, we all reach the plateau. That steady, uneventful stretch where nothing feels particularly exciting… or particularly wrong. Authority exchange relationships are no exception. In this class, we’ll explore what it means to experience a plateau in your dynamic, how to recognize it, and how to navigate it with intention rather than fear or frustration. Drawing from both personal experience and the wisdom of martial arts, where it’s said that true growth happens on the plateau, we’ll reframe these quiet stretches as opportunities for reflection, resilience, and depth.  This class offers grounded insight and practical tools to sustain your connection even when the road feels flat. Join Tomo for a steady, honest conversation about what it means to keep going, and keep growing, when the high points aren’t in sight.

Healthy Communication - Speaking, Listening, and Staying Aligned in Authority Exchange
Strong communication is the foundation of any relationship and in authority exchange relationships, it’s absolutely essential. The way we speak, listen, and respond shapes the trust, clarity, and structure that our relationship relies on. In this class, we’ll explore communication through the lens of hierarchical relationships. We’ll look at both verbal and non-verbal communication, how misunderstandings happen, and how to listen deeply, especially when emotions run high. Improving our communication within the framework of our individually defined dynamic doesn’t mean letting go of structure, it means learning to live more fully within it. With better tools, we can experience greater alignment, less friction, and more calm in our daily exchange of power. Join Tomo for a grounded, practical exploration of how to speak and listen in ways that strengthen your relationship.

Ethical Non-Monogamy in Leather and Kink Communities
Many of us in the Leather, kink, and BDSM worlds find connection, intimacy, and meaning in relationships with more than one person. While polyamory can offer deep fulfillment, it also comes with its own set of challenge, especially when layered with the intensity of our identities and community culture. In this class, Tomo shares insights and experiences from decades of living and loving in polyamorous relationships. We’ll explore various forms and definitions of polyamory, the process of consciously choosing non-monogamy, and the essential tools for doing it well like communication, consent, time management, and emotional clarity. We’ll also examine common challenges, including jealousy, misalignment, and role confusion, and discuss practical ways to navigate them. Whether you're brand new to polyamory or looking to refine how you practice it, this class offers real talk, practical advice, and a bit of humor along the way.

Polyamory and Power: Navigating Non-Monogamy in Authority Exchange
Polyamory can be complex on its own.  When layered with hierarchical authority exchange, it introduces a whole new level of intensity which may both simplify and complicate at the same time. In this class, Tomo shares lived experience and thoughtful framing to explore the intersection of polyamory and Authority Exchange relationships. We’ll look at different ways hierarchy can exist across multiple partnerships and how those layers interact including exploring maintaining clarity within complex structures, navigating differing levels of authority among partners, creating shared expectations, and addressing the emotional and logistical challenges that can arise. We’ll also explore what makes these dynamics deeply satisfying and sometimes even wildly fun. This class is ideal for those currently practicing polyamory within authority exchange or those considering it and will offer insight, strategies, and as always, a bit of humor.

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Correction is Welcome

Rules, structure, and protocol form the foundation of a healthy authority exchange relationship, but just as important is how we respond when things go off track. Mistakes, misunderstandings, and missteps are inevitable. What matters is how we engage in those moments. Correction, when done well, reinforces dynamic, builds trust, and invites growth. Done poorly, it can cause mistrust and possible harm. In this class, we’ll explore correction from both sides of the slash: how correction is given with clarity and purpose, and how it’s received with openness and grace. We’ll examine why correction matters, how it supports alignment, and how to navigate the emotional charge that can sometimes come with being corrected or offering correction. Whether you’re in a leadership role or in service, you’ll walk away with practical strategies for turning correction into a positive, affirming part of your dynamic. Join Tomo for a grounded and thoughtful look at how correction, that than a punishment, can be a powerful act of connection and growth.

Obedience, Compliance, Alignment
Inspired years ago by a moment behind the wheel and a very opinionated GPS, Tomo began reflecting on the deeper meaning of obedience, compliance, and alignment within Authority Exchange relationships. That moment sparked an ongoing exploration that continues to shape his understanding of surrender in authority exchange. In this class, we’ll consider the nuanced differences between obeying a command, complying with a directive, and aligning one’s will in service. As a Master, do you seek obedience, or is your aim mutual alignment? As a slave, do you follow orders, or do you strive to internalize and embody the will of your leader? How do these concepts shift with time, trust, and lived experience? Through personal stories and community-rooted insight, Tomo leads this thoughtful discussion on how obedience, compliance, and alignment shape authority exchange—and how our relationships evolve as we learn about each level of surrender more deeply.

Levels of Exchange - Depth, Intensity, and Progression in Authority Exchange Relationships
In Master/slave and other relationships that exchange authority, it’s essential to understand exactly what is being surrendered and what is being accepted. This kind of clarity doesn’t come from assumption. It comes from reflection, communication, negotiation and ongoing informed consent. Authority exchange is not static, it is a living, evolving process that can deepen over time. In this class, we’ll explore how relationships move through different levels of exchange, whether by incorporating more areas of life under the dynamic, increasing the intensity of control, or expanding the scope of responsibility and surrender. Tomo will lead this moderated discussion by sharing his own experiences and insights as we examine the progression of power exchange. We’ll talk about how to approach deeper levels of surrender with intention, how to assess readiness for growth, and how to communicate clearly as the shape of the dynamic changes. Whether you're just beginning to structure your dynamic or navigating a shift into deeper territory, this class invites thoughtful exploration into what it means to grow in authority exchange, together.

Healthy Surrender - Power, Responsibility, and Ethics of Authority Exchange
Surrender is hot. Surrender is powerful. When done with care, surrender is one of the most beautiful gifts we can offer or receive in an Authority Exchange relationship. As Masters, we aim to shape the dynamic we envision, offering structure and control. As slaves, we strive to obey and align, offering our surrender to that authority.

As the depth of our exchange increases, so does the risk that surrender can become unhealthy, especially when red flags are ignored or the human being is forgotten. In this class, we’ll explore how to recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy surrender. We’ll take honest inventory of ourselves, as leaders and followers, and examine our core needs as humans within the context of Authority Exchange. We’ll share experiences, name the warning signs of imbalance or harm, and discuss practical tools to maintain integrity, accountability, and safety within deep authority exchange. This class is a call to mindfulness and a reminder that true surrender must never cost us our health, our identity, or our well-being and that power always includes care.

Middle Management - Serving, Leading, and Navigating the In Between
In some authority exchange relationships, a slave may be asked to manage others, whether training a newcomer, overseeing household, or holding responsibility while still under someone else's command. This “middle management” role can be deeply rewarding... and a little complicated. In this class, Tomo shares insights and stories from years of experience living in that middle space, where obedience and leadership must coexist. We’ll explore why this dynamic can be hot, powerful, and deeply fulfilling and also why it requires clear structure, emotional maturity, and well-defined roles to avoid confusion or resentment. We’ll discuss potential challenges, common misunderstandings, and ways to foster mutual respect among all involved. Whether you're a Master designing a layered household, a slave managing another, or someone navigating shared power, this class offers tools and perspective to support success, clarity, and joy.

Vanilla with Sprinkles – An Introduction to Hierarchical Relationships
Curious about kneeling before you’re allowed into bed? Turned on by Dominant/submissive roleplay and wondering what it might look like beyond the bedroom? Whether you're fantasizing about a night, a weekend, or a lifetime of authority exchange, this class is your invitation to explore how to make it real. More than just “Kink 101,” this class introduces the foundations of authority exchange, from playful scenes to long-term D/s or M/s relationships. Tomo, who has lived in 24/7 hierarchical dynamics for many years, offers guidance on how to negotiate authority exchange safely, clearly, and with confidence. We’ll explore: the difference between kinky sex and power exchange, how to negotiate giving or taking temporary authority, emotional and physical safety when playing with control, and what D/s might look like outside the bedroom. With Tomo’s honest, story-rich teaching style, you’ll get practical tools, real-life examples, and probably a few good laughs. Whether you're brand new or curious, you’ll leave with a clearer understanding of what’s possible when Dominance and submission meet desire, consent, and intention.

The Centered slave
In martial arts, center, alignment, and connection are the foundations of power, balance, and flow. These same principles can guide those of us who serve, helping us to stay grounded in the face of both ease and challenge. In this class, Tomo draws from decades of martial arts training and experience in authority exchange to explore what it means to be a centered slave. We’ll look at how maintaining emotional and energetic balance supports deeper surrender, and how alignment allows us to meet our leader with clarity and intention. Together, we’ll examine what happens when we lose our center, through stress, resistance, or disconnection, and how we can return to it. We’ll also explore how to navigate internal impediments without abandoning our path, and how to restore connection when it feels shaken. This is a class for those who follow, serve, and surrender. Whether you’re early in your journey or seasoned in long-term authority exchange, this is a space for honest reflection, grounded learning, and renewed alignment within yourself and your relationship. This class is open only to those who serve in hierarchical relationships.

Grounding, Centering, and Connecting in Authority Exchange Relationships
In martial arts, principles like center, balance, alignment, and connection are essential for effective, grounded technique. These same principles can offer powerful insight into authority exchange relationships, especially when applied to how we lead, serve, and stay present through challenge. In this class, Tomo draws on decades of martial arts training and experience in Authority Exchange relationships to explore how we can strengthen our connection and alignment from both sides of the dynamic. We’ll look at how staying grounded, emotionally, mentally, and energetically, supports a more intentional exchange of power, even during difficult or uncertain times. Together, we’ll examine alignment from both perspectives, explore how the Leader can guide the dynamic with clarity and purpose, and how the follower can navigate obstacles and reconnect with their Master’s path with grace and integrity. This class is an invitation to deepen your practice of authority exchange through conscious presence, mutual alignment, and a shared center. All who are interested in or engage in Authority Exchange are welcome.

Surrender with Power - Embracing Strength in Obedience
Powerful people often bring independence, assertiveness, clarity, and presence to every aspect of their lives. But when it comes to surrender, many of us are taught, explicitly or implicitly, that personal power and surrender can’t coexist, which is simply not true. In this class, we’ll explore how personal power can be a strength—not a liability in surrender. We’ll look at the misconceptions around powerful slaves and how to navigate the tension between yielding and leading. Whether you’re a powerful person seeking to surrender, a slave seeking to build your own connection with power, someone managing a powerful slave, or simply curious about how strength and service align, this class offers an exploration of the many ways power can show up in surrender. Tomo offers insight, storytelling, and encourages reflection to help you reconnect with your internal power as you place it in another’s hands as a tool to be used with intention.

The “s” in M/s D/s - Exploring the Identity, Intention and Practice of Surrender
What does it mean to serve, to follow, or to surrender - not just in scenes, but as a way of life? In this class, we’ll explore how we define “slave,” “submissive,” or “servant” for ourselves, and how we can live those identities with clarity, strength, and intention. We’ll examine the difference between power exchange and authority exchange, how to serve from a place of personal power, and what it means to offer ourselves in service day after day, not just when it’s easy. We’ll also reflect on how to discover what we have to offer, how to choose partners with care, how to navigate conflict, and how to survive transitions while staying rooted in who we are. Most importantly, we’ll talk about the deep truth at the heart of surrender: it’s not about you. This class is open to all who serve, surrender, and follow, whether you're just beginning to explore authority exchange or have years of experience. Join Tomo for an honest, grounded, and interactive conversation about what it means to be the “s” in M/s or D/s. To maintain a safe and open space, this class is limited to those who serve in hierarchical relationships.

slaves - How Much is Too Much?
As slaves, we often strive to align ourselves with the will of another. But over time, the line between surrender and self-sacrifice can blur, and when it does, the impact can be lasting. In this class, we’ll explore what it means to surrender with intention, and how to recognize when we may be giving beyond what’s healthy, sustainable, or aligned with our core self. We’ll discuss how to stay rooted in personal power and identity while offering deep and meaningful service, and how to recognize the difference between surrender that nourishes and surrender that depletes. Together, we’ll reflect on questions like: Where is your line? What does “too much” feel like in your body, your mind, or your heart? How do we course-correct when we’ve given past our limits? Whether you’re new to authority exchange or have lived in deep dynamic for years, you’re invited into a thoughtful and honest conversation about the power of saying yes, and the importance of knowing when to say no. To provide a safe and open space for reflection, this class is limited to those who serve in hierarchical relationships.

The Inside Scoop: What Your slave Won’t Tell You (But I Will)
Ever wish you could peek inside the mind of your slave? Wonder what really inspires service or what quietly undermines it? Curious to ask questions you’d never dare bring up with your own slave… without risking your Master's card? Here’s your chance. In this candid, supportive session, Tomo, who has lived for decades as both Dominant and slave, offers insights into the internal landscape of service: what motivates surrender, what builds trust, what causes resistance, and what makes power exchange feel not just functional, but deeply fulfilling. This is also a confidential, judgment-free space for those who lead, guide, and command. Bring your real questions, your doubts, your curiosities. To ensure a safe and open environment, this class is limited to those who lead in hierarchical relationships.

To Serve - The Basics
You know in your heart that you are meant to serve, to kneel, to follow, to surrender. The feeling runs deep, even if you can’t always put words to it. And yet, you may find yourself asking: What now? How do I begin? What do I need to know? This class is for those who feel the call to serve and surrender but are still learning how to live that calling with clarity, skill, and confidence. Tomo will offer a structured, grounded introduction to service providing tools, insights, and guidance to help you define what service and surrender look like for you.  We’ll explore foundational skills every servant should know, the emotional and practical realities of surrender, and how to begin walking your path with intention. Whether you’re just starting out or seeking to reconnect with the basics, this class offers encouragement, direction, and a safe supportive place to ask the questions. This class is open to all who serve, submit, or surrender in authority exchange dynamics.

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Conflict Resolution Within an Authority Exchange Framework

Living in an authority exchange relationship brings beauty, structure, and deep connection, but it also brings complexity. When conflict arises, it can be especially challenging to address it without damaging the dynamic itself. This class explores how to resolve conflict while maintaining the integrity of your M/s or D/s framework. We’ll cover the basics of conflict resolution - what stays the same across all relationships, and what is specific to authority exchange relationships. From both the Master’s and the slave’s perspective, we’ll look at how to stay in agreed to protocols, remain connected and present while navigating hard conversations. The goal of this class is to strengthen your conflict resolution skills and explore what it takes to move through struggle while keeping the foundation of authority exchange intact. Whether you lead, follow, or live somewhere in between, this class offers a grounded, honest conversation about the work of staying in relationship, even when it’s hard.

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Living the Life 24/7 - Joy, Challenge, and Commitment in Authority Exchange
Living in Authority Exchange isn’t something I do, it’s who I am. Choosing to live in an Authority Exchange relationship means walking a path that is both deeply fulfilling and sometimes deeply demanding. It’s a way of life marked by joy, growth, structure, and continual self-discovery. In this moderated discussion, we’ll explore what it means to live 24/7 in an authority exchange dynamic from both sides of the slash. We’ll talk about what draws us to this path, what sustains us, and how we navigate the inevitable challenges that arise along the way. Whether you’re living this life now or seeking it, this class offers a space for honest reflection, shared experience, and the celebration of a relationship style that is fulfilling, joyful and complex.

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Authority Exchange Across the Miles

You’ve found the perfect Authority Exchange relationship... with one major complication: they’re on the other side of the country or even the world. Long-distance relationships are tough enough in the vanilla world. Add in the structure, intensity, and emotional depth of authority exchange, and the challenges become even more complex. The distance however doesn’t have to dilute your dynamic. With intention and creativity, it can actually deepen your connection, sense of service, and erotic energy. In this class, Tomo draws on years of experience in long-distance authority exchange relationships on both sides of the slash. We’ll explore the emotional and logistical complexities of maintaining hierarchy across miles, and share practical strategies for building consistency, staying close, and reinforcing the dynamic even when you’re far apart. Whether you’re already in a long-distance M/s relationship or considering one, this class offers insight, support, and tools to sustain your relationship when together and apart.

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You Get What You Inspire - Engagement in Authority Exchange

Motivation and engagement are powerful threads that bind us in authority exchange. When nurtured with intention, they become the source of depth, joy, and sustained connection. In this facilitated discussion Tomo, who has lived as both a Dominant and a slave for decades, shares reflections on what it means to inspire from both sides of the slash. We’ll explore how trust, obedience, and devotion are cultivated over time; how to observe and respond to what motivates your partner; and how both leadership and surrender require active, ongoing engagement. This class invites participants to not simply expect control or obedience, but to inspire it, nurture it, and lead in ways that grow deep connection. Through insight, storytelling, and shared experience, we’ll explore how inspiration fuels growth, deepens service, and sustains the living, breathing practice of authority exchange.
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Deepening the Dynamic: An Authority Exchange Intensive (3 or 4 hour intensive)

Join Tomo for an immersive journey into the heart of Authority Exchange relationships. Drawing on many years of lived experience as both a Dominant and a slave, Tomo leads this intensive with stories, exercises, and practical insights designed to enrich and deepen authority exchange on both sides of the slash. We’ll explore how to inspire obedience, cultivate surrender, and stay rooted in trust and accountability. Through discussion and guided reflection, participants will consider what it means to engage fully in the work of M/s D/s, whether you're leading or serving. We will also include lessons from Japanese martial arts, principles like centeredness, alignment, and connection, offering tools to help us stay grounded in times of conflict, and peaceful in moments of joy. Whether you’re brand new to authority exchange or have been living this path for decades, this class offers clarity, humor, inspiration, and a space for meaningful growth, within yourself and within your dynamic.


Mindful Self Growth

These Bags Are Heavy - Surrender While Managing Trauma
I once had a therapist tell me that living in relationships that exchange authority was a slippery slope for me.
And sometimes, it has been. For those of us who carry trauma from childhood, previous relationships, or illness, the path of surrender can be both profoundly healing and deeply complex. The bags we carry are heavy, and choosing to kneel while still holding their weight in some moments can feel daunting. In this heartfelt, grounded discussion, Tomo shares his personal journey of navigating trauma while living as someone who surrenders. Drawing on decades of lived experience, he will speak candidly about the challenges, missteps, and lessons  learned to serve with joy while healing old wounds. Participants are invited to reflect and share their own experiences: the fulfillment we feel in surrender, the roadblocks that rise up, and the tools we’ve discovered to meet both with grace. This class offers a space of compassion, honesty, and hope for anyone walking the path of authority exchange while also doing the work of healing.

I'm Too Damn Old To Be A ....  Aging, Adaptation and Authority Exchange
Aging is inevitable, no matter how hard we try to ignore it. Bodies change. Emotions change. Brains change. While we may still burn with desire to serve, lead, play, or kneel, the reality is… sometimes our knees just don’t agree. In this candid and compassionate class, Tomo invites participants into a real conversation about the impact of aging on authority exchange dynamics, BDSM and kink. We’ll explore physical limitations, cognitive shifts, chronic pain, and emotional recalibration, not as the end of the road, but as invitations to adapt, evolve, and continue finding joy and connection. With humor and, honesty Tomo shares personal insights and practical suggestions for navigating the challenges of aging while staying rooted in your dynamic. Whether you're a Master with a bad back or a slave with a slower pace, this class will offer tools, validation, and hope for living fully in Authority Exchange as the years go by.

Some Days I Feel Like a Piece of Taffy - Stretched and Still Serving
What happens when you’re Type AAAA, polyamorous, grandparent, martial arts teacher, Producer, Leather leader, Dominant and a slave, with a to-do list that could intimidate a small army? For many of us who live deeply layered lives, the feeling of being stretched in too many directions is all too familiar. In this honest and fast-paced class, Tomo shares tools and lessons learned from a life full of service, authority exchange, and public leadership, all at once. We’ll talk about what it means to be an organized slave, how to prioritize competing demands, maintain emotional connection, find time for everyone (including yourself), and stay grounded while navigating multiple relationships and many responsibilities. Whether you're living it now or see it on your horizon, this class offers practical ideas, a few laughs, and maybe even a little breathing room. All in 90 minutes. You're welcome.

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​Getting It Done: Service, Structure, and Slaying the To-Do List

Ever wonder how some slaves seem to get it all done and still show up early, polished, and ready to serve? Feeling overwhelmed by your task list or like you’re always running behind in service? The secret isn’t having more hours in the day, it’s about making the most of the ones you have. In this focused and practical class, Tomo shares  strategies for staying organized, efficient, and grounded while juggling the many responsibilities of a life in service. With decades of experience balancing service, work, leather leadership, and relationships, Tomo will walk you through the tools and mindset that help him “do it all” without burning out or deprioritizing the dynamic. Whether you’re new to structured service or looking to sharpen your skills, this class will offer insight, encouragement, and a whole lot of checklists.

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Community Building

 

From Intention to Action: Building Inclusive Leather Events
In the Leather Community, many of us intend to create events and spaces that are inclusive, accessible, and welcoming. But good intentions aren’t enough - we need the skills, tools, and commitment to back them up. With over 40 years of experience in event production and a lifelong dedication to social justice, Tomo brings both insight and honesty to this facilitated discussion. Through stories, lessons learned (the hard way and heartfelt way), and practical strategies, we’ll explore how to move from intention to action, without placing the burden of education on the very communities we’re trying to support. This class is for producers, leaders, and community builders who are ready to take responsibility for creating truly inclusive environments and who understand that doing the work means, well… actually doing the work. Come ready to reflect, listen, and engage. It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being better.

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When the S*** Hits the Feed: Leading Through the Fire

Leadership in leather isn’t just about titles or timelines - it’s about trust. And that trust is built (or broken) by how we communicate, especially when things get hard. We’ll take a grounded, real-world look at what it means to lead with transparency, clarity, and integrity in today’s leather landscape. We’ll explore how honest, professional communication can strengthen relationships, de-escalate conflict, and reinforce community values, even when the online fires are burning hot. We’ll talk about how to respond (or not) when targeted by social media outrage, and how to stay rooted in your truth without becoming defensive or disengaged. Tomo will share what’s worked for him as a long-time producer and community leader, as well as what he has learned the hard way. Expect a mix of practical tools, personal storytelling, and a bit of humor about what it means to survive and thrive as a visible leader in an unforgiving digital age.

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Yes You Can: Confidence, Clarity, and Curriculum for Educators

Ever wondered if you could teach in our community? The answer is yes—you absolutely can. If you feel called to teach in our community, this class will help you take those first steps with confidence and clarity.  Drawing on decades of experience as both an educator and event producer, Tomo offers a grounded, practical guide to becoming an effective and impactful teacher. We’ll explore how to develop classes rooted in lived experience, create meaningful learning structures, and identify what you have to offer. Topics include class formats, timelines, finding your voice, building confidence, navigating imposter syndrome, and adapting your content for both in-person and virtual spaces. You’ll also learn how to design impactful classes and generate topics that reflect your unique perspective. As always, expect a mix of personal stories, hard-won lessons, and a few laughs along the way. We’ll leave time for questions and reflection - and yes, there may be homework. If you’ve ever questioned whether you have something worth sharing, this class will help you say “yes,” and give you the tools to do it well.

 

Rooted in Service, Built for Community: The Foundations of Event Leadership

We’ve all been to events that ran like clockwork, and others that felt like they were held together with duct tape and desperation. Whether you’re planning your first small gathering or steering a large community conference, strong event production is about more than logistics, it’s about vision, structure, and service. Drawing on over 40 years of event production experience, Tomo offers a deep dive into the essential elements of event planning. From venues and budgets to accessibility, diversity, inclusion, timelines, and team dynamics, this class will walk you through the critical systems that hold an event together. New producers will leave with a practical roadmap to get started; seasoned producers will gain tools to streamline their process, troubleshoot challenges, and build sustainable events that serve and uplift community.


BDSM

Top/bottom - What You Always Wanted to Ask
When Tomo first entered the kink community, he had about a thousand questions, and used a rotary dial telephone to get answers. This class offers those answers in person, with heart, humor, and a deep respect for the Leather Community and the education it provides. What does a good Top do? How can I surrender? How do I take care of a bottom? Can I be both? How do I stay safe? What if I screw it up? Where do I even begin? Whether you’re curious about topping, bottoming, Authority Exchange, or all of the above, this class offers a supportive, non-judgmental space for those just starting out to get real answers to your questions. We’ll cover safety, communication, negotiation, and how to gain confidence in your play. No question is too basic, no worry too small. Bring your curiosity, your questions, and your courage. We’ll bring honesty, encouragement, and a few good laughs. Everyone starts somewhere, and this is a great place to begin.

More Than You Thought You Could Take: Building Endurance and Ecstasy in Pain Play
Whether you take pain for yourself or for your Top, pain can be erotic, ecstatic and sometimes downright miserable. If you’re a masochist, this class offers practical tools to help you care for your body, increase your capacity, and go take pain over time. For submissive masochists who don’t seek pain for its own sake, we’ll explore how pain becomes meaningful through surrender and service, and how to prepare both mentally and physically to take more than you thought possible. We’ll also talk about how Tops can help inspire deeper endurance by creating connection, safety, and purpose, drawing more out of a bottom than they may think they have to give. We’ll cover preparation for body and mind, in-the-moment techniques to extend scenes, and what it takes to push through “the wall” in a way that honors your body and your dynamic. We'll also discuss aftercare practices that support recovery and help your body prepare for the next scene and the long-term journey. Through honest discussion and personal stories, you’ll leave this class with tools to take more pain, and more pleasure, in a way that’s hot, healthy, and sustainable.  

Massage for Sadistic Pleasure
Most massage is about easing tension and bringing comfort to the receiver. This one’s not. In this hands-on class, we flip the script and focus on massage as a tool for sadistic delight, where the goal isn’t relaxation, but exquisite discomfort. We’ll explore techniques that allow Tops to use their hands, forearms, and body weight to manipulate muscle and fascia in ways that produce pain (but not damage). Along the way, we’ll cover essential topics like body mechanics, consent, safety, and the surprising therapeutic benefits of deliberate suffering. You’ll learn about pressure points, meridians, and the difference between pain and harm. Bring a partner if you like, and come ready to experiment. Participation is optional, but encouraged. Whether you’re a curious Top or a masochistic bottom, this class promises practical skills and lots of sensation.  No nice scented oils necessary.
 
Hands that Serve, Hands that Heal
Massage can be many things, healing, sensual, connective and in the context of service, it becomes something even more powerful. Drawing from the Japanese art of Shiatsu, this class explores how touch can be both a service, a gift and a tool, for your partner and yourself. Shiatsu is a method of finger-pressure massage that works along the body’s meridians (energy pathways) to relieve stress, ease tension, and support overall wellness. Tomo will guide participants through a basic wellness routine focused on the back and neck, along with key pressure points that can help maintain healthy muscle function and energy flow. We’ll touch on foundational concepts from Eastern medicine, including the meridian system and the role of energy balance in healing. You’ll learn how to use your body efficiently, using gravity and leverage instead of muscle strain to offer massage as a sustainable act of care and service. Participation is encouraged but not required. Come learn, watch, or practice and leave with practical skills and a new service to offer.

​Don't Move - Binding With Rope 101
Think rope is sexy but way too complicated? You’re not alone. If you’ve ever wanted to control your partner’s movement using rope but felt intimidated by intricate knots and suspension rigs, this class is for you. Tomo will break it down with simple, effective rope techniques that are easy to learn and satisfying to use. We’ll cover essential safety tips, basic ties, and offer plenty of time for hands-on practice. By the end of class, you’ll have the skills and confidence to bind your partner securely. What happens after that is entirely up to you! If you can tie your shoes, you can do this. Bring a partner or come solo. Tomo will have rope available to borrow and lots of encouragement to share. No experience required, just curiosity and a willingness to learn.

Hojojutsu – Martial Art of Tying a Prisoner
Designed for control, not comfort, these ties deliberately target air, energy, and blood pathways causing increased pain and pressure when the prisoner resists. The techniques are elegant, efficient, and uncompromising. In this hands-on class, we’ll honor the martial roots of Hojojutsu while adapting the techniques for safer use in consensual play. Tomo will share a brief history of Hojojutsu, explain traditional rope types, and demonstrate how to prepare rope for use. Participants will learn several capture ties (Hayanawa) and if time permits, we’ll also explore transport ties (Honnawa) used to replace the initial capture rope with something more sustainable for long-term restraint. This is a hands-on class, though observation is always welcome. Please bring rope if you have it; some will also be available to borrow.

Capture, Bondage and Torture Techniques of the Samurai

(This can be a standard 90 minute class or a 3 hour intensive.
Rooted in the combat traditions of the Samurai, this class adapts techniques from Jujutsu and Hojojutsu for intense, consensual play in the dungeon. You’ll learn how to use pressure points, pain manipulation, body mechanics, and joint control from classical Jujutsu to take down, restrain, and control your bottom. These skills will be applied directly to maintaining control during Hojojutsu rope ties. Hojojutsu, the martial art of prisoner restraint, targets air, energy, and blood pathways, producing extreme discomfort when the subject resists. These ties are efficient, effective, and designed for control. This class preserves the martial intent of these techniques while ensuring they are taught in a safer manner for play. We’ll cover takedowns, restraint methods, and ties, with hands-on instruction and personalized guidance throughout. Participation is encouraged but not required. Please bring rope if you have it; some will also be available to borrow.

Pressure Points To Cause Pain
Meridians are energy pathways used in martial arts, acupressure, and acupuncture that cancause intense pain without causing injury or leaving marks. These pressure points require minimal strength to activate and can be highly effective on most body types. In this hands-on class, we’ll locate and practice several of the most effective points for getting your bottom’s attention, inducing pain, executing take-downs, or subduing with control. You’ll learn proper techniques for applying pressure using your body, as well as how to enhance the sensation with simple tools. We’ll also cover essential safety considerations to ensure the experience remains intense but safe for all involved. Participation is not required, but highly encouraged. Get ready to make your partner wince in all the best ways.

Takedown and Control  
Let’s get rough, safely. This class explores take-down and control techniques adapted from martial arts for consensual rough play in the dungeon. You’ll learn how to subdue, restrain, choke, and apply controlled pain to gain and maintain authority over a willing or resisting bottom. Whether you're big, small, strong, or slight, this class proves that effective control isn’t about size, it’s about technique, leverage, and intent. We’ll focus on accessible, high-impact techniques that anyone can learn, with plenty of time to practice in a safe, structured, and sexy environment. This is a hands-on class. Come ready to engage and leave with new tools for physical control.
 
The Joy of Punching
Punching can be hot, intimate, raw, and deeply connected. Hands-on sadism delivers a kind of intensity no toy can match. But nothing kills the mood faster than an unintended injury to the Top or the bottom. In this class, we’ll start with the fundamentals: how to punch safely, effectively, and without hurting yourself. Proper striking technique and precise placement make all the difference. We’ll explore a variety of ways to punch and target areas to create pain that ranges from thuddy and delicious to sharp and overwhelming.  This hands-on class focuses on connection through impact, the eroticism of force, and how to bring sadistic pleasure to your scenes, one punch at a time.